What I Will and Will Not Assume About You

When I see you walking down the street there are some baseline assumptions that I am going to make about you based on my own experiences and what I have heard from others currently involved in the grand experiment called the human condition. I will assume that you do not enjoy pain. Therefore, I will […]

Goodbye Thursdays

I had plans to write something great today. I was going to tell you how Ruby and I both got glasses, and how cute we were, and how excited she was. I was going to tell you that Edward was jealous, but that he will also be getting glasses in a few weeks after further […]

The One Thing You Should Never Ask a Man

I was at Edward’s soccer game the other day, watching the kids warm up and kick the ball around, when it happened. I know I am not the first man this has happened to, but really, it is 2016. Haven’t we learned to be a little more sensitive by now? I think you all know […]

The Things We Eat For Love

On Saturday morning, Edward decided to make my wife breakfast in bed. Being six years old, I did not think that he had what it took to make a truly..what’s the word…edible breakfast. But he surprised me. He made eggs for everyone. He got the bowl out, cracked the eggs, fished the pieced of shell out […]

You Should Probably Just Vaporize Yourself

Ruby is taking the bus to school now. This is despite her many protests, scowls, and threats. For the first part of the week I rode the bus with her, got off with her, and then bused myself back home. Wednesday she had Forest School of course, and yesterday I tried taking the bus with […]

You’ve Heard of Method Acting? Try Method Bedtime!

Method acting is a technique popularized by the late Marlon Brando in which an actor literally tries to become a character. They want to emotionally be inseparable from the part they are playing. If their character is mean, they act mean all the time, even when the cameras are not rolling. If they are supposed to […]

Two Kids, Two Parents, Two Schools

Ruby started fourth grade today, and Edward started first grade. This is very exciting, but a little sad, because for the first time ever I did not get to drop off one of my children on their first day of school. I couldn’t. It was impossible. They are going to two different schools now. We […]

The Age of Man

“It’s grand to be an Englishman in 1910. King Edward’s on the throne; it’s the age of men!” I had no idea what these words meant when I first heard them sung in the film Mary Poppins as a young child. I just knew that Mr. Banks was happy with his life, even though he was very clearly unhappy […]