On Sundays We Dream of Fire: Conversations With a Kindergartener

As a stay-at-home-dad, no one can accuse me of not spending enough time with my kids, but this weekend, with my wife out of town, I got an extra helping of “quality time.” This meant more bickering, more whining, more frustration, and more exhaustion, but it also meant more opportunities for deep and meaningful conversations with my children. Conversations like these:

Edward: “Daddy, is it gonna be Sunday tomorrow?”

Me: “Yes.”

Edward: “Oh good, because then I will dream of FIRE! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!”

Me: “You dream of fire on Sundays?”

Edward: “YES! I will tell myself to have the fire dream tonight…”

Me: “The fire dream…?”

Edward: “With a biiiig DRAGON! And he will fly over all the city and breath FIRE and burn up my school!”

Me: “That doesn’t sound like a nice dragon.”

Edward: “It’s okay, there’s no school on Sundays.”

 

Ah, the insights into the minds of our children, gleaned simply by listening to the terrifying things that they say. But not to worry! They are not always scary; sometimes they are mean:

Edward: “Daddy, when I grow up I’m going to be big and fat like you!”

Me: “That’s not a very nice thing to say.”

Edward: “Why not? I AM going to grow up and be big and fat like you!”

Me: “Well, I’m glad you want to be like me, but calling people fat is not nice.”

Edward: “Oh, Daddy, I didn’t mean that you were fat. Only that your belly is fat and I will poke it and it will go boing boing boing!”

Me: “Hey, cut that out! Ow! That’s not nice!”

Edward: “Well, you DO have a fat belly you know…”

Me: “Sigh… back to the gym.”

 

Yes, children will often tell you exactly what they think. This can be a good thing. But on the other hand, I will be very happy to send them off to school tomorrow so I can rejoin the adult world where we all lie to each other and pretend that we are not fat and dreaming of fire.

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Posted in Dragons, Edward, Parenting, School, Weight.

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