Well, after 8 1/2 years of it, things are about to change. This is it. Tomorrow, Edward will start kindergarten, even as Ruby moves up to 3rd grade, and my life will never be the same. From 8 AM to 3 PM I will have no children to take care of. This is monumental.
Today, I have two children. We have doctor’s appointments and haircut appointments, open house at school and errands to run. It is a busy day, completely consumed by my children’s needs. I ought to be learning music. I ought to be doing a dozen other things, but I am not. I am focused on my children. And today is the last day.
I don’t really have time to be writing this at all. Tomorrow I will have way more time. Tomorrow I can go to my meetings at church…alone! Tomorrow I can write something better and longer for this site. Tomorrow I can clean the kitchen. Tomorrow I can wave goodbye as my kids both go off to school. Tomorrow I will have time.
I am out of time. There is none left. The kids are growing up, and the days, those terrible, wonderful, frustrating, purposeful days of being with them 24/7 are over. This is the last day. Or am I being melodramatic? There are still weekends and summers and vacations and holidays. I am not completely out of time. But it won’t be the same. Maybe I will enjoy the time I do have a little more, because there will be so much less of it. Maybe I will look back on today and wish to be here again someday. But actually I have had enough of today.
Today is busy. Today is hard. Today we have to go get blood drawn. Today we need to refill prescriptions and change medications. Today we have no kitchen, because the man is here installing a new one. Tomorrow is looking pretty good. Yesterday is looking pretty good too. Tomorrow, today will be yesterday, and will it look good? Eventually it will. Hard to say when, because tomorrow life will not be the same as today. Today is the last day. Today is the end of yesterday. This is it. Here we go. See you tomorrow.