As an expert in the field of personal weight loss (you will be pleased to know that I have lost 15 pounds in the past two months), it has occurred to me that you may also want to reap the benefits of my vast knowledge. Sure, some of it is hard work, but really weight […]
Category Archives: Exercise
Betrayed By My Body
Look body, we had a deal. I leave you alone, and you leave me alone. My soul was never thrilled about being tethered to this mortal plane to begin with, and there is no reason for either of us to make things difficult. And we never seemed to have an issue in the past, so […]
This Year I’m Giving Up Being Fat and Lazy
There was a slightly awkward silence in the room as we all tried to fill it with mumbles and smiles and half-sentences. “I’m not saying that you have to do anything!” Rev. Dark Murmurs insisted, “I was just wondering if you were doing anything for Lent this year.” It seemed as though no one in the room, […]