Health Problems That Ought To Go Away If You Ignore Them Long Enough

The human body is a wonderful and resilient thing.  No, we can’t grow back a lost limb or anything (sorry Dr. Connors!), but we can build up immunities to diseases we’ve had, and even some that we haven’t!  We can adapt to live in warmer or cooler climates, we can turn annoying noises into white noise that we don’t notice anymore, and if we sit next to a terrible smell for a long enough period of time, we don’t even smell it anymore!  Yes, our human bodies are constantly adapting and changing for our health and comfort, but sometimes I think they are just being lazy.

I have various health problems, like anyone else I suppose, ranging from the ignorable to the painfully annoying, and it seems to me that some of them really ought to just go away on their own.  If I plow through them, shouldn’t my body be able to adapt to what I am doing?  I certainly would never want to change my own behavior in any way for any reason, so it stands to reason that my body should know that and act accordingly.  For example:

CAT ALLERGIES – I think I am allergic to cats.  Just a little bit.  Every time one of my two cats sits on my lap for some purr and fur, I get watery eyes and a sniffly nose.  Just a little bit.  But enough so that it is noticeable and annoying.  But the thing is, I have pretty much always had cats!  I had cats growing up, and I have had cats living with me for the past eight years.  Why has my body not gotten the message yet?!  These cats are not going anywhere, so stop being allergic to them!  Adapt, body, adapt!

LACTOSE INTOLERANCE – There is also the matter of my lactose intolerance.  When I was very young I couldn’t have milk at all.  I used to pour orange juice on my cereal.  True story.  But then I grew out of it and started drinking milk again and never had another problem.  Except for, you know, all the problems.  I didn’t even notice the issue myself really, but my wife pointed out that every time I ingest a significant quantity of dairy, my throat gets all gunked up, I have a slightly harder time breathing, and I just feel all around a little worse.  Really, body?  I have been eating dairy products like they were going out of style for the past thirty years!  Can you not figure out how to effectively deal with them?  When I first started eating spicy foods, I thought tabasco sauce was like lava unto my tongue, but after eating spicy things for years, I can now down tabasco like it was water.  Why is it different with milk?  Stop being stupid.

BACK PAIN – I realize that I have a four thousand pound two-year-old that I have to lug around, and I know that this can affect me.  The chiropractor has already told me all of this.  But shouldn’t doing that same thing over and over again actually strengthen my back?  At least in theory?  When I ride my bike over and over again, my legs get stronger and it makes riding easier in the future.  When I pick Edward up over and over again, my back gets weaker and it makes me want to die and unable to get out of bed in the morning without help from the windowsill.  I feel like I should be able to power through the burn and come out again on the other side with a super baby lifting body, not a frail, decrepit body that can barely stand.  How does this make any sense?

So, to put a fine point on it, ignoring your health problems does not actually make them go away.  But it totally should!  Right?  Right?

*sigh*

I need an Advil.