As an expert in the field of personal weight loss (you will be pleased to know that I have lost 15 pounds in the past two months), it has occurred to me that you may also want to reap the benefits of my vast knowledge. Sure, some of it is hard work, but really weight […]
Category Archives: Poop
The Five Alarm Diaper of Easter 2007
I sure don’t miss diapers. But the sad thing about no more diapers is no more diaper stories. Like returning warriors with PTSD, parents love to swap and tell diaper stories, proudly displaying their scars like badges of honor. Luckily I still have some old stories to tell. Like, for instance, the five alarm diaper […]
Curly: The Dog Who Pooped All Over Me in the Car
Anna, the Pugpoo Pikachu, is the best advertisement for puppies that one could possibly concoct. Simply walking down the street with her is enough to garner dozens of “ooh”s and “aah”s and, of course, “where did you get that puppy?”s and “are there any more left?”s. I got her from my mother, I would tell […]
The Worst Thing About Being a Parent
When you decide to become a parent (or have it sprung upon you), you know in advance that there are going to be ups and downs. Pluses and minuses, if you will. No, there can be no preparation for it, but at least you have some idea of what to expect, right? I imagine that […]
New Heights of Naughtiness and Destruction
The first thing that my two-year-old son Edward did yesterday was to make a decision. There’s no way he could have been so naughty and so destructive just by chance. No, he had to have been working hard at it intentionally. As soon as his sister left for school he immediately went upstairs into her […]
Disaster in Diapers
Let me give you some backstory before I dive right into this tale. The first thing you should probably know is that we have been trying to potty train Edward in an extremely unsuccessful manner, but the important thing to know is that he has been wearing pull-ups instead of diapers. The only problem is […]
Poop in the Pool
As you know, I have recently joined a gym. As you also know, it is far too expensive to actually use the gym, due to the fact that I have small children that I am not allowed to balance on the handlebars of my exercise bicycle, and so am required to pay money for their […]
We Like to Potty (We Like, We Like to Potty)
Friends! I bring you tidings of great joy! For behold, Edward has pooped in the potty! I wasn’t there for it; I was at work, so everything you are about to hear is completely second-hand, but I’m pretty sure I have the right of it. Well, okay, I was there for the very beginning of […]
Awareness of Poop
I am currently in Florida spending my time as “Tenor,” and so there have not been a lot of “Dad” posts in recent weeks. I am, however, excited to share some wonderful news with you. Edward has taken his first step towards the most urgent and important of parenting goals: potty training. THE ROAD TO […]