Don’t Buy a Phone From Josh

I am writing to warn all of my loyal readers about a sneaky and slimy salesman at the AT&T store on Dorset Street in South Burlington, VT.  His name is Josh, and he is a giant (unprintable in a family blog).  If you get the chance you should buy a phone from Stephen, the best, nicest, and most helpful associate in the store.  He’s worth the wait, believe me.

After my iPhone 3GS fell out of my pocket in St. Petersburg last spring, Stephen helped me buy my iPhone 4 about 6-8 weeks ago.  Not only was he nice and helpful, he lowered my monthly bill by $30/month while adding services.  That’s the kind of great employee he is.  I also went home with a free $40 phone case.  Go to this guy.  He will help you.

Well, as it turned out, Poseidon destroyed my new phone last Friday, and I was in Massachusetts, despondent and freaking out.  I borrowed a phone, called directory assistance, and asked for the number of my local AT&T store, hoping that Stephen had some magic up his sleeve that could save my recently deceased phone.

When the call was picked up, a voice said, “AT&T Store, Josh speaking.”  I asked to speak with Stephen, who had previously told me that he always works on Fridays.  “He’s not in today,” Josh lied.  Now, I knew Stephen was probably there, so I asked again.  Was he sure?  “Yeah, he hasn’t been in all week.  Can I help you with something sir?”  No, I didn’t want help from this obvious social miscreant.  I asked when Stephen would be in again.  “I’m not sure.  I don’t think he’s scheduled all next week either.  But I can help you with anything you need.”  I hung up the phone.

So I spent the afternoon putting my phone in rice, driving around to other AT&T stores, and generally wasting my time as my phone continued its journey to the underworld.  The next week, when I arrived back home in Vermont, I decided that I needed a phone again, and so on Friday I went back to see Stephen at the AT&T store.  He knows all the ins and outs of the system, and so within minutes, I had another new iPhone 4, and did not have to pay $700 for it.

I asked Stephen if he had been in the previous Friday.  He said that he had been there all day.  I relayed to him my conversation from a week prior, and his co-worker Josh stood next to him, as a sly smile crept across his face.  Boy, if punching people in their smug, greasy little faces wasn’t illegal….

Anyway, I have my phone again, and I am very happy.  And don’t buy a phone from Josh.  He sucks.

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