Ruby’s Wish

If there was any sort of downside to Edward’s wish, and believe me you have to look pretty hard to find one thanks to the prowess and proficiency of Make-A-Wish, it was that Ruby didn’t get one. Yes, we all got to go on Edward’s amazing trip, but it was his trip. We did his favorite things, and got to do everything he ever dreamed of. And while I expect there would always be some degree of jealousy among all wish-siblings, hopefully most of them will understand that the Wish Kid had been through something terrible, and that was why they were getting the wish. Only how can I say that to Ruby when she went ?through the same thing her brother did?

Yes, his was worse, but both of my children were diagnosed with epilepsy shortly before their 4th birthdays, both were controlled for a time by medication, both had their meds stop working as they entered kindergarten, both had bizarre and horrible seizures that the doctors could not figure out, both came close to dying during seizures that stopped their airflow, and both of them (knock on wood) suddenly stopped having them in December of their kindergarten years. Hers were slightly different, but Ruby’s story was the same. And she did not get a wish.

Now, I do not blame the Make-A-Wish people for this. Make-A-Wish does not reach out and contact families with sick children. You have to be referred, and there is a process, and we were just moving from Baltimore to Vermont when Ruby’s problems started. We weren’t a part of the community yet, not really, and we were not referred. And certainly Edward’s issues were more life threatening than hers, and there are plenty of reasons why she did not get a wish and he did, and they are all very logical and make sense. But it still sucks that she basically had the same issues and then watched her brother’s dreams come true, no matter how much she enjoyed the trip.

And again, let me stress that she had an amazing time in New York. We all did! And yet, I knew what I had to do. I needed to grant her wish. So I asked her. “Ruby, if the Make-A-Wish people had asked you what your wish would be, what would you have said.” And this is what she said:

“I would wish to live with a tribe of Native Americans for a week, they way they used to live before the Europeans came over and attacked them and stole their land.”

Huh. I was hoping she would say “Hawaii.” So here is where I am asking you and your networks for help. You see, I googled this idea, and I got nowhere. In fact, I found that, to some Native Americans, this is a very offensive request. They do not want to be thought of as primitives out on the prairie doing war dances and smoking peace pipes. They drive cars, shop at the supermarket, and spend too much time on Facebook, just like the rest of us. And I want you to know that my daughter is in no way trying to be offensive. She is just very attracted to living in the past. When she grows up she wants to live on a farm in the jungle with no electricity. But she had always felt strongly for the plight of the Native American. I blame “The Indian in the Cupboard” series. She is outraged when she reads history books and finds out how that group of people were treated by the conquering settlers. Native American culture is not a joke or a stereotype or a curiosity to her.

Well, I couldn’t find anything. I couldn’t even find a summer camp that would let her live that experience. I need help. Is this wish possible? Do any of you, or any of your friends, know how to make such a wish come true? Are there tribes that would be up for something like this, or camps that specialize in this sort of thing that don’t pop up on my google? I have come up short in my searching, but maybe one of you has an idea. You are spread all over the country and the world, and I need you. Because I made myself a promise, made my daughter a promise, that I would grant her wish, if possible. And maybe it’s not possible, but if it is, I hope we can find it how to do it together.

If you have any information on how my daughter could live and learn Native American history with a tribe of Native Americans, please comment on this post, or you can find me on social media via one of those buttons below. Tweet me, send me a Facebook message, or shoot me an e-mail. I would love to make this happen for her. But for now, I’m at a loss. Thanks in advance.