Edward’s Thoughts on Preschool

You know, I was really looking forward to sending Edward to preschool.  Freedom!  Four mornings a week to myself!  And then he had to go and get on that stupid bus and make me all sad and stuff.  Not cool.  His Mom rode in with him for his first day and then I had to go teach voice lessons, so the morning passed quickly, and when we both got home after lunch I got to ask him all about his new school.

Me: “Edward, did you have fun at school today?”

Edward: “Yes, I did!”

Me: “Oh, wow.  What did you do at school?”

Edward: “Ummmmm, I don’t remember.”

Me: “Did you make any new friends?”

Edward: “Yes!”

Me: “What is one of your new friends’ names?”

Edward: “Naked boy!”

Me: “Naked boy?”

Edward: “Yes, I love play naked boy at school!”

Me: “Edward………are you naked boy?”

Edward: “No, Daddy!  I not naked boy!”

Me: “Okay, phew.  Well, did you like your teachers?”

Edward: “Yes!”

Me: “Do you remember your teachers’ names?”

Edward: “All the teachers are named ‘Big Dick.'”

Me: “Ummmmm, are you sure about that?”

Edward: “Yes!  Big Dick!  Big Dick!  Burdick!  Bahdick!  Beedip!”

Me: “Right.  And did they give you lunch at school?”

Edward: “No.”

Me: “They didn’t?  They are supposed to feed you lunch.”

Edward: “No Daddy, I didn’t have lunch at school.”

Me: “It says here that you are supposed to have pizza on Tuesdays.  Did you eat pizza at school?”

Edward: “Oh yes, I ate pizza at school.”

Me: “So you did have lunch…”

Edward: “No, I didn’t have lunch, only pizza.  I need lunch right now.  I need candy for lunch.”

So as you can see, three year olds are not to be trusted, and I have no idea what he did at school, or who naked boy is.  Maybe this afternoon I will get some better information out of him.  And if not, there are always parent-teacher conferences.

Posted in Edward, Parenting, Photo, Pizza, Preschool, School.

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