What My Kids Did When I Told Them We Were Moving

Did I mention that we were moving? No, I didn’t, because it was not public knowledge until quite recently. But now that it has been announced in the church’s annual report and I have had several congregation members ask me about it, I feel safe to finally announce that next month we will be leaving the co-op and moving into the church’s parsonage. The church will get some more work out of me, we will get a place to stay at way under market value, and everyone will be happy. Well, almost everyone.

If you have been a regular reader of this blog then you will be aware that I have two different children. And by that I mean I have two very different children. Not that they aren’t well rounded. They are both perfectly capable of being anything they want. Just not at the same time. When one is fast, the other is as slow as possible, and right when I can’t take it anymore and want to scream at both of them, they switch. I’m sure this is very funny to them deep down, although externally they do not appear to be joking.

So we have Ruby who, like her father, hates change. She likes things to stay the same, which as we all know is impossible. She is already feeling angsty about growing up, and she is only 9! When I even hinted at the fact that we might move, she just about had a total meltdown. She has informed me that, no matter where we live, she will be walking home after school to the co-op with her co-op friends, and I can pick her up for dinner if I must. Her big final end-of-year project for third grade was for something called “The Invention Convention,” and it almost broke my heart when I saw what her project was.

For the convention, you are supposed to find a problem that people have in their lives, and then create a solution to it. So for instance if you were to create a robot that folded laundry, you would be my best friend forever. Everybody picked a serious issue, such as being hissed at by the cat when giving the cat its food, and came up with an invention to fix the problem. Ruby’s problem that she was trying to solve: that we were moving. Because one of the main reasons we are looking to move is an extreme lack of space, Ruby invented a piano that folds up into the wall, thus creating more room in the living room and causing all people thinking about moving out of co-ops and into bigger parsonages to cease their nonsense and stay put.

Edward, on the other hand, breaks out into a grin every time you even mention the parsonage, and he starts bounding around our tiny apartment like a pinball declaring loudly that he will finally have his own room, and why can’t we move today, and can I please give him some boxes so he can start packing! This is, of course, very annoying to his sister, who does not enjoy seeing him pack up his half of their shared room. Ruby plans on packing the day before we move, she told me, and if she can get away with it, maybe even the morning of the move. She cannot get away with it, but she is going to try.

Ruby will be staying at the same school, which was never really a question for us. We knew she would never want to leave her friends, and she has been there for 4 years now with 2 years left to go. We won’t be across the street anymore, but I can handle driving her to school until she learns to take the city bus. Edward will not be staying at the school, however. He demanded that he be able to switch to the new school a few blocks away from the parsonage, and he is counting down the days until he gets to make a fresh start.

To be fair, he has had a rough year. He wasn’t even in school for half of the fall, and everyone in his class knows that he had a seizure at school, and he is the boy who has to wear a helmet on the playground, and he is just different. Edward does not like to be different. I think he will be very happy to start over at a place where nobody knows about his past. And we are really hoping that the past stays the past. It is June 10th. In two days it will be the six month mark. No seizures for half a year. Nobody knows why, but we are not complaining. And if things continue to improve, a new school might be just what the doctor ordered.

If you are thinking that this is all a bit too black and white, don’t worry. Even Ruby got a little excited when I took them over to the new place earlier this week. She got to see her new humongous room that she will not share with any brothers. She got to explore some of the space, and I think she’s going to come around and be very happy there. And her two best co-op friends have both moved out in the last month anyway, so I think that helps. And Edward is a little sad about leaving the community that we have here, especially his next door neighbor and best friend. They will both have something to look forward to and something to miss as they leave it behind. Just like their parents. But I have to say that I am pretty excited about my zero-minute commute, and my wife’s two-minute walking commute. I am excited to be a block away from the grocery store and two blocks from the library. I am thrilled to be heading into the heart of downtown for a new adventure, and the kids will deal with it in their own ways. They always do. And then they will probably switch.

Posted in Children, Church, Edward, Moving, Parenting, Ruby, School, seizures, The Co-op.

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