The Problem With My Brain

There is a problem with my brain.  I suspect that I may have ADD.  Or ADHD.  Or whatever they are calling it these days.  Thinking about it now, I was definitely that kid back in school, and even though they didn’t have Ritalin in those days, I’m sure they would have tried to give it to me in elementary school to try to focus my attention.  I was always acting up in class, and the only time I was really able to be myself without getting into trouble was on the playground.  We had a pretty cool playground at my elementary school, with this one really awesome tree that I eventually learned to climb, although I don’t think we were really supposed to be climbing it.  Actually, now that I think about it, I used to climb that tree after school, not at recess.  At recess I would hang out with my friends and play “Girlbusters,” which was just like “Ghostbusters” only we were terrified of girls instead of ghosts.  We even had our own theme song, which was probably my very first parody ever.

Ghostbusters, as you might have guessed, has been my favorite movie for a very long time.  I first saw it in 2nd or 3rd grade, and it has stuck with me through all these years.  My wife even took me to see it on the big screen a year or two ago when they brought it back for one night only at a local theater.  Nothing beats seeing a movie on the big screen.  This Friday we’re going to see “Iron Man 3,” which looks fairly awesome.  I’ve heard that it is more of a sequel to “The Avengers” than to “Iron Man 2,” which is okay with me, because I thought that “The Avengers” was a much better film than “Iron Man 2” anyway.

Iron Man is funny, because he’s made of iron, making him different from other superheroes.  Like, Spider-Man is not made of spiders.  He has the powers of a spider.  And Batman is not made of bats.  So you would think that Iron Man should have the powers of an iron.  You know, smoothing out clothes and stuff.  But that would not make a very interesting super hero.  Ironing is boring.  I hate ironing.  In fact, I almost never do it, probably because I don’t care if my clothes are a little wrinkled.  I do get my suit dry cleaned, and some shirts pressed from time to time, because my voice teacher always gives me a hard time when I come for an audition and he feels that my shirt has a wrinkle in it.

I understand that auditions are about what you look like almost as much as what you sound like, but seriously, you can’t even see most of my shirt under my jacket, so unless that wrinkle is right in the front of my shirt to the side of my tie, nobody is going to notice it.  Seriously.  And it’s not even audition season now anyway, so I don’t really need to worry about wrinkly shirts.  I need to worry about t-shirts and shorts, because it’s almost summer!

This summer I really want to take a trip somewhere awesome, although I don’t know where yet, and I don’t know if I will be able to afford it, because to me “somewhere awesome” means somewhere far away and exotic, and that also means expensive.  I guess if I want to take a trip, I need to make more money, which means I need a real job, or at least more of a job.  A second part time job.  Two part time jobs are not as good as one full time job though, if you need insurance.  You can work the same hours and make the same money, but without insurance coverage, you are screwed.  Luckily my wife has health insurance for the family through her job, so I can see the doctor whenever I want.

This Friday, before I go see “Iron Man 3,” I am going to the doctor to find out if he thinks I have some sort of attention deficit, and if perhaps I can do anything about it.  Because it’s really hard to get anything done when you are always being distracted by things.  And that, dear readers, is the problem with my brain.