I have a new bed,it’s incredibly large.Truly the size for a king.My wife really hates it.She’s visibly angry,but sadly I can’t do a thing. The old bed was squishyand lumpy and stupidand each day I woke with back pain.I need something firmerto hold my big self upwithout creaking low with the strain. Okay, yeah I […]
Category Archives: Poem
Villanelle Parables
As some of my long-time readers will remember, a few years ago I wrote some limerick parables, mostly just to annoy my friend in church choir. These went over pretty well, so I added some haiku parables as well, and just to beat a dead horse, I went ahead and translated them over into sonnet […]
Poems At Children
There are many wonderful books of poetry out there for children, but these poems all seem to have the same problem of validating their atrocious behavior and/or teaching them a life lesson in a gruesome manner. None of these poems seem to be telling the children what we actually want to tell them. And then […]
One Year of Tenor Dad
Today is my blogiversary. One year ago today, late in the evening, I decided to start a blog. I was feeling sad about moving to Vermont, spending the Fall in New York, and leaving behind so many people, and so my first post promised to keep in touch with everyone that I would no longer […]
Real Estate Notes
When I was four I livedin C Major.I knew no sharpsor flats. The yard was openand full of grass, my room brightand full of harmony. At the age of sevenI moved awayto B flat minor.The small house calledout in sad voiceswithout rest.We had no yardand the new dogbit my brother. Now I reside in a […]
Where, Oh Where Can I Find Some More Hair?
Where, oh where can I find some more hair? Mine seems to have gone on vacation. Although it’s a bummer it’s nice in the summer, When my head could use the aeration. Don’t know where it went, because I haven’t spent Too much time wearing tight fitting hats. I’m not too stressed out, I don’t […]
Haiku Parables
Well, my Limerick Parables were a big hit it seems, so since I am bored today, I thought I would translate them into haiku form, for those of you who think limericks are too bawdy and gauche. Here are much classier (and, thankfully, shorter) versions of the wisdom of Jesus. 1) Guy gets beaten up […]
Too Little For Skittles
My laptop died yesterday. I mean really died. It is getting power, but it won’t turn on. I’ve tried to start it plugged in without the battery, I’ve let it sit for hours and tried again. I took the entire thing apart, screw by screw, and re-seated every component, but still it lies there, silently, […]